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Original: 7/5/2009 11:35 AM
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oOBuBBLes711Oo
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Sunday, July 05, 2009

The Newer Testament Part 3: Mayhem in Bethlehem

 It seems that a lot of Christians conveniently believe the Old Testament (OT) is good until contradicted then they quickly disavow it and opt for the New Testament (NT).  While this serves as a clever way of weaseling out of a tight spot in a debate, it made me wonder, why stop at 2 versions?  We all know great things come in trilogies.  The Bible, being the best seller of all time, was so good that it naturally deserved a sequel in the NT, but isn't it about time we made a 3rd installment?  I mean, we haven't had an update in the past couple thousand years.  Shouldn't we get an edition that is relevant to the times and speaks for our generation?  I mean, the "New" in the NT is pretty much a bunch of rules made by cavemen.  For crying out loud, since that time we've landed on the moon, cloned animals, and invented the ipod. 

I believe the 21st century needs a new version of the Bible that will address the hard-hitting issues that simply didn't exist back in Bibical times and to clarify some topics that are best not left up to interpretation.  In the Bible 3, it should discuss whether or not abortion is murder, whether or not gays should have the right to marry, is Obama the Anti-Christ, and how long should I wait before I call her?  If the Bible is as progressive as scholars claim it is, then why isn't it moving forward?  And now that we have advanced so far in legal speak, couldn't we get some lawyers in there to draft a bulletproof scripture that takes out all the ambiguities and interpretation?  I mean, the Bible was written by men anyway, so why not do it again?  America's forefathers drafted the Constitution and crafted our government so they would be able to adapt and survive for centuries.  I think it's time the Bible did the same thing.

 Posted 7/5/2009 11:35 AM - 24 Views - 8 eProps - 4 comments

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Visit oOBuBBLes711Oo's Xanga Site!

I like this

Posted 7/5/2009 12:15 PM by oOBuBBLes711Oo Xanga True Member - reply

Visit CyborgSociety's Xanga Site!
I was thinking the exact same thing
Posted 7/5/2009 12:53 PM by CyborgSociety - reply

Visit aqua_aiko's Xanga Site!

a cliff's notes version downloadable for the ipod would be better in slang terms so that average people understand it easier, instead of the shakespearean sentences in the other bibles that usually need interpretation. I think charles barkley should write the 3rd installment:)

Posted 7/5/2009 6:32 PM by aqua_aiko - reply

Visit jhenny89's Xanga Site!
This was absolutely hysterical. Love God haha but love this too.
Posted 7/8/2009 12:43 AM by jhenny89 - reply


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